He attends an LGBT gender identity discussion group, but gets overwhelmed and leaves partway through.Įzra and Felix ask Leah, who knows how to hack, to check people’s Instagram’s accounts for signs they may be Grandequeen69. Declan tells Lucky he has feelings for him.įelix continually questions his gender identity, feeling that the identity of trans man does not totally describe him. Felix realizes Declan was not behind the gallery, but keeps talking to him. He tells Lucky about the gallery, noting his sympathy for Felix and how he is disgusted by the bigotry at his school. He feels unworthy of love.ĭeclan and Felix, as Lucky, begin getting very close. Felix believes he is jealous because he has never kissed anyone or been in love, and wishes he has been. He starts getting messages from an account called “grandequeen69” saying they were behind the gallery, and saying Felix is a girl and will never be a real boy.Įzra starts seeing a boy in their grade, Austin, which makes Felix jealous. Felix’s father has supported him throughout his transition, paying for testosterone and top surgery, but still does not call him Felix, only “kid” which hurts him.įelix decides to create a fake Instagram account under “Lucky” to befriend Declan, hoping to uncover a secret about him he can expose as revenge for the gallery.

He since drafts emails to her but never sends them. Felix emailed his mother to tell her about his transition, but she never replied. Felix’s mother left him and his father when Felix was 10. He thinks it may be Declan Keane, Ezra’s ex-boyfriend who used to also be friends with Felix, but has ignored them since he broke up with Ezra in 9th grade.įelix writes an email to his mother explaining what happened, but does not send it. The next day, Felix walks into school at see a gallery of large photos of him before he transitioned, from his Instagram account that he has made private along with his deadname. They cut class often, Ezra feeling unmotivated about his future and Felix so stressed over building a portfolio for college applications he avoids it entirely. Felix lives in Harlem with his father, often staying over in his best friend Ezra’s apartment. The 17-year-old narrator, Felix, attends a summer program at his arts high school In Brooklyn, St. The following version of this book was used to create the guide: Callender, Kacen.

Felix ever after